Hello again! I'm writing soon because I wanted to follow on from my last post: Put into Perspective - http://rbayes-anewchapter.blogspot.co.uk/2014/09/put-into-perspective.html in which I wrote about how we are each just one person out of a very large population and the lives that we cross through brief encounters.
Today I want to write about how we should react to these brief encounter moments because believe it or not, we can have a massive impact on the people around us, both in positive and negative way.
Last winter my drama group at college devised a piece of theatre with the "butterfly effect" as a very prominent theme. The idea that every time we interact with people, no matter how small and seemingly insignificant that encounter may be, it will cause an effect. This has been on my mind a lot over the last couple of weeks as the stimulus was the London Underground. For this play we explored the connection between the busyness of London and the 'London Lifestyle', and the effect we have on each other. For example bumping into someone and causing them to spill their coffee, could then make them late, therefore they might not get the promotion they needed which could be necessary to financially support their family... You never know.
While I'm here in London I want to try and firstly discover the truth of that idea, and secondly pay clear attention to what I do, especially the small things and become very aware that my actions have an effect. - The second part isn't just for London, and I hope that reading my post will make you think about trying this as well.
The truth is that we can not know the full extent of what our small actions may result in, because as I said in my previous post we don't know the names of the people around us so how are we supposed to know their stories. However, something that I think we can be sure of is that we have the power to cause brilliant or potentially devastating effects to those around us and the world would be a much happier place if we really made a conscious effort and tried to give a positive effect. A simple smile might be all it takes, or saying "good morning" could make someone's day, you don't know, that might just have been what they needed.
Think about it as you go about your day-to-day lives, especially on the days when you're feeling like crap, stop for a minute and put it all into perspective, and maybe just smile at someone, it might make you feel better too.
Thursday, 18 September 2014
Tuesday, 16 September 2014
Put into Perspective
Hello there! I'm sorry I've not written in a while, I always used to be terrible at regularly keeping a diary as well, but it's been tough to find time to sit down and write. I've been here 2 weeks now, and I've pretty much settled into a routine (a very busy one), though it's very new and different from how my last 18 and a half years have been, I'm enjoying this new chapter.
Living in a city can be really mind blowing (for other reasons than the regularity of the public transport), Its really weird to see so many different people every day and realise; that they're all individuals and they all have a life. It's great at putting life into perspective. This is not a completely new concept to me and I'm sure it won't be to you either, but living in a big city really visualizes the scale of it. Standing on a packed bus or in tube carriage being surrounded by all those people, each of whom has their own: day-to-day lives, their own relationships, their own joys and their own struggles.
It's amazing to thoroughly consider that sobering thought about two lives crossing paths, for that brief moment, maybe the person who bumped into you on a crowded street or the person who let you on the bus before them, or the person who pushed in-front of you. Perhaps it's a regular brief encounter, my current favorite of these is the man who lives a couple of doors down from me and we pass most mornings at 8.20am as I'm on my way to the bus and he's walking his dog, we both are usually eating a banana for breakfast. I don't know his name, or his story and he doesn't know mine, but we say "good morning" to each other and just for that moment two lives cross.
You might think I'm crazy for finding this so fascinating, but it reminds me that I'm only one person in a city with the popualtion of 8.3 million, and a world population of 7.2 billion and each one of those is a human with their own life and their own story. The link below is to a world clock, which depicts the true scale of things. Just something to think about.
Ihttp://www.worldometers.info/world-population/
Living in a city can be really mind blowing (for other reasons than the regularity of the public transport), Its really weird to see so many different people every day and realise; that they're all individuals and they all have a life. It's great at putting life into perspective. This is not a completely new concept to me and I'm sure it won't be to you either, but living in a big city really visualizes the scale of it. Standing on a packed bus or in tube carriage being surrounded by all those people, each of whom has their own: day-to-day lives, their own relationships, their own joys and their own struggles.
It's amazing to thoroughly consider that sobering thought about two lives crossing paths, for that brief moment, maybe the person who bumped into you on a crowded street or the person who let you on the bus before them, or the person who pushed in-front of you. Perhaps it's a regular brief encounter, my current favorite of these is the man who lives a couple of doors down from me and we pass most mornings at 8.20am as I'm on my way to the bus and he's walking his dog, we both are usually eating a banana for breakfast. I don't know his name, or his story and he doesn't know mine, but we say "good morning" to each other and just for that moment two lives cross.
You might think I'm crazy for finding this so fascinating, but it reminds me that I'm only one person in a city with the popualtion of 8.3 million, and a world population of 7.2 billion and each one of those is a human with their own life and their own story. The link below is to a world clock, which depicts the true scale of things. Just something to think about.
Ihttp://www.worldometers.info/world-population/
Sunday, 7 September 2014
The Dive
So hello again! Thanks for coming back!
This is Day 6 in the Big City! And I have to say I am loving it! There's so much to do and see and people to meet and the buses come more than once an hour (even on a Sunday!)
Yesterday I went to the V and A museum (Victoria and Albert) and it was amazing, definitely worth a visit especially the fashion and theatre and performance sections (though I might be a bit biased).
So today I want to share a little bit a wisdom that I can't take credit for because it's collaborated from things others have said and things I've seen etc but I'm going to add my own personal touch to it if I can. It's something that's really been on my mind and has helped me so I'm going to pass it on because it can help for the life changing moments and the everyday situations.
Its all about our Comfort Zone, and I know it's really corny and its talked about a lot, but that doesn't seem to stop us remaining snuggled up where we're cozy in that comfort zone. Because we hear it, we think oh that's a good idea and then we're actually too scared to do anything about it!
So first of all I want to depict the whole comfort zone "thing". I was hoping to find a diagram but I can't find the right one and my drawing's not great! If you like you may draw your version... So think of your comfort zone as a circle and in that circle are, surprisingly, all the things that you're comfortable with, so for example loved ones, your home, old hobbies, old routines etc. Then around that first circle is another slightly larger circle, this represents your exploration zone, so this is where you start to test and try the possibility of what's beyond your comfort zone, then at the edge of that circle is: nothing, or what we think is nothing.
A fantastic analogy for this, that I heard today, is a beach. The sand is the comfort zone, when you start to paddle you are starting the the exploration zone, and as you continue to walk further into the sea it gets a bit more terrifying because you don't know what you will meet, but eventually you come to a point where your feet will no longer touch the floor, that's the edge. I don't know whether you've seen it or not but the video below is a great picture of this.
The bit that gets me in this video is the moment before he dives and he waits, because that's exactly what we do, we hesitate and most probably we also chicken out.
See the problem is we limit ourselves, we stop ourselves. Sure we'll blame it on all sorts of things, not enough money, other people, shame, etc etc. But really they're just all excuses, what's really stopping us, is US. The only person that could have really prevented that diver from taking that leap into the unknown was him.
And look what happens when we do dive, when we take that leap! Because yes that jump off the edge of our exploration zone into "nothing" is terrifying, but it's also where miracles happen, where the excitement is immense and where we can grow. And looking at the whole picture we realise we would have been so stupid to not take that leap. I watched an episode of Dating in the Dark last night (as you do when you have an evening to yourself) if you don't know the show, 3 women and 3 men go on a series of dates in the dark and at the end they have to select one person to see in the light and then decide if they want to start a relationship with them, if so they go and meet them on the balcony, it's all about seeing if love is blind? Anyway 2 people had been getting along really well and they both selected to see each other and the woman went out on the balcony, the man wanted to go but he was scared that she wouldn't be there and he didn't want to get his heart broken. As the audience member I could see her waiting while he was considering leaving, and I was silently yelling at the screen because if only he would take that leap of faith there was something so great waiting for him. Fortunately he did take that step and he was very glad he did!
But imagine if he hadn't, and for us, we can't see the whole picture but imagine if we don't take that step, what are we missing out on? And I don't know about you but 'what' and 'if' are two very mind-torturing words when strung together.
Someone once said to me, if you ever get too comfortable it's time to move on, and that's a scary concept, but it's also the only way we can grow.
I want to end with a christian song lyric which says:
"Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith will be made stronger"
We really need to learn to take that dive, in big things like moving away from home, or starting a new job, or taking a chance on someone, or the smaller things, maybe starting a new hobby or a new routine or simply starting a conversation with someone. Because it's so amazing what happens when we do take that step, it's terrifying, sure, but amazing.
This is Day 6 in the Big City! And I have to say I am loving it! There's so much to do and see and people to meet and the buses come more than once an hour (even on a Sunday!)
Yesterday I went to the V and A museum (Victoria and Albert) and it was amazing, definitely worth a visit especially the fashion and theatre and performance sections (though I might be a bit biased).
So today I want to share a little bit a wisdom that I can't take credit for because it's collaborated from things others have said and things I've seen etc but I'm going to add my own personal touch to it if I can. It's something that's really been on my mind and has helped me so I'm going to pass it on because it can help for the life changing moments and the everyday situations.
Its all about our Comfort Zone, and I know it's really corny and its talked about a lot, but that doesn't seem to stop us remaining snuggled up where we're cozy in that comfort zone. Because we hear it, we think oh that's a good idea and then we're actually too scared to do anything about it!
So first of all I want to depict the whole comfort zone "thing". I was hoping to find a diagram but I can't find the right one and my drawing's not great! If you like you may draw your version... So think of your comfort zone as a circle and in that circle are, surprisingly, all the things that you're comfortable with, so for example loved ones, your home, old hobbies, old routines etc. Then around that first circle is another slightly larger circle, this represents your exploration zone, so this is where you start to test and try the possibility of what's beyond your comfort zone, then at the edge of that circle is: nothing, or what we think is nothing.
A fantastic analogy for this, that I heard today, is a beach. The sand is the comfort zone, when you start to paddle you are starting the the exploration zone, and as you continue to walk further into the sea it gets a bit more terrifying because you don't know what you will meet, but eventually you come to a point where your feet will no longer touch the floor, that's the edge. I don't know whether you've seen it or not but the video below is a great picture of this.
The bit that gets me in this video is the moment before he dives and he waits, because that's exactly what we do, we hesitate and most probably we also chicken out.
See the problem is we limit ourselves, we stop ourselves. Sure we'll blame it on all sorts of things, not enough money, other people, shame, etc etc. But really they're just all excuses, what's really stopping us, is US. The only person that could have really prevented that diver from taking that leap into the unknown was him.
And look what happens when we do dive, when we take that leap! Because yes that jump off the edge of our exploration zone into "nothing" is terrifying, but it's also where miracles happen, where the excitement is immense and where we can grow. And looking at the whole picture we realise we would have been so stupid to not take that leap. I watched an episode of Dating in the Dark last night (as you do when you have an evening to yourself) if you don't know the show, 3 women and 3 men go on a series of dates in the dark and at the end they have to select one person to see in the light and then decide if they want to start a relationship with them, if so they go and meet them on the balcony, it's all about seeing if love is blind? Anyway 2 people had been getting along really well and they both selected to see each other and the woman went out on the balcony, the man wanted to go but he was scared that she wouldn't be there and he didn't want to get his heart broken. As the audience member I could see her waiting while he was considering leaving, and I was silently yelling at the screen because if only he would take that leap of faith there was something so great waiting for him. Fortunately he did take that step and he was very glad he did!
But imagine if he hadn't, and for us, we can't see the whole picture but imagine if we don't take that step, what are we missing out on? And I don't know about you but 'what' and 'if' are two very mind-torturing words when strung together.
Someone once said to me, if you ever get too comfortable it's time to move on, and that's a scary concept, but it's also the only way we can grow.
I want to end with a christian song lyric which says:
"Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander and my faith will be made stronger"
We really need to learn to take that dive, in big things like moving away from home, or starting a new job, or taking a chance on someone, or the smaller things, maybe starting a new hobby or a new routine or simply starting a conversation with someone. Because it's so amazing what happens when we do take that step, it's terrifying, sure, but amazing.
Tuesday, 2 September 2014
Moving Day
Dear Reader, today was the day I stopped living at home full time, in simpler words: I moved out. It's been a day full of anticipation and the excitement of starting something new, however, it's also been a day of farewell...
Saying Goodbye is something I have never found easy, I don't think anyone finds it easy really. It's very tricky not to be sad about saying farewell, whether it's to friends or to family, and whether its only for a short period of time or if you don't know exactly when you might see them again. Because even though they may sometimes send you insane, it's impossible not to miss loved ones when they're not around.
The best way to cope I have found, especially today, is not to think of the negatives, but to think of the positives, for example the next time we'll get to say hello, or all the stories to share when we next meet. Or perhaps the reasons for saying goodbye (they ought to be good otherwise what would be the point?) So for me I said "goodbye" in return for:
Saying Goodbye is something I have never found easy, I don't think anyone finds it easy really. It's very tricky not to be sad about saying farewell, whether it's to friends or to family, and whether its only for a short period of time or if you don't know exactly when you might see them again. Because even though they may sometimes send you insane, it's impossible not to miss loved ones when they're not around.
The best way to cope I have found, especially today, is not to think of the negatives, but to think of the positives, for example the next time we'll get to say hello, or all the stories to share when we next meet. Or perhaps the reasons for saying goodbye (they ought to be good otherwise what would be the point?) So for me I said "goodbye" in return for:
- Independence (defined: 'freedom from the control, influence, support, aid, or the like, of others')
To me this means the chance to make mistakes and have to fix them without my parents (although that doesn't mean I won't be calling them with the occasional questions!) A chance to learn lessons, without a teacher, and the opportunity to discover more about myself in the "real world". - Experience
(defined: 'the observing, encountering or undergoing of things as they occur in the course of time, leading to gaining knowledge or practical wisdom')
For me, although Ashby de la zouch has been a lovely place to grow up, the possible opportunities are slim, where I am now, however, there's a new experience around every corner. Different things to observe, new things to encounter and exciting things to undergo! As well as becoming a lot more streetwise and gaining knowledge about my new city, I will learn many more life long lessons that I will never forget! - Relationships (defined: 'Connections, associations or involvements')In exchange for "goodbye"s, I get many more "hello"s. Though I will never forget those I love from home, and will remain close to them, there's so many more people to meet! New acquaintances, new friendships and new bonds to build with the people around me.
Monday, 1 September 2014
Tomorrow's the Day
"Courage is not the absence of fear, rather the judgement that something else is more important than fear, the brave may not live forever, but the cautious do not live at all. From now on you'll be travelling the road between who you think you are and who you can be, the key is to allow yourself to make the journey"
Dear Reader, welcome to my first Blog Post! I've decided to start a blog on the eve of a new chapter in my life, so here goes...
There is loads of story lines about a girl moving to the Big City and the adventures she comes across, so I'm going to see if that's in anyway true. I am moving to London tomorrow, a bit of a change from my small, historic market town that pretends to be beside the sea and milks any claim to fame it possibly can. (sorry for the dig Ashby de la zouch). I want to use this blog to write about my experiences and maybe to record any possible exciting adventures, but more likely to help me to figure out my place in the world and perhaps to help you reader to do the same or just to entertain you as I share this exhilarating and nerve-racking new chapter of my life with you, and Hey, if it's any good it may become a best-seller in your local bookstore one-day.
The quote above is a quote I've known from my childhood, thanks to 'The Princess Diaries' and it came back to mind as my moving out day drew closer. A big change of leaving home, moving from a small town to a big city, starting a new job, a new course so many new things whether it feels terrifying or exciting it still takes courage to make that step of faith. This blog would have nothing to record if I wasn't brave enough to take the risk that I could just fall flat on my face. I'm titling this blog 'A New Chapter', because it's the next step for my life, and it's the beginning of a new journey, to a new place, to a new style of life where I'm going to make more mistake, learn more lessons and discover more about who I am.
Dear Reader, welcome to my first Blog Post! I've decided to start a blog on the eve of a new chapter in my life, so here goes...
There is loads of story lines about a girl moving to the Big City and the adventures she comes across, so I'm going to see if that's in anyway true. I am moving to London tomorrow, a bit of a change from my small, historic market town that pretends to be beside the sea and milks any claim to fame it possibly can. (sorry for the dig Ashby de la zouch). I want to use this blog to write about my experiences and maybe to record any possible exciting adventures, but more likely to help me to figure out my place in the world and perhaps to help you reader to do the same or just to entertain you as I share this exhilarating and nerve-racking new chapter of my life with you, and Hey, if it's any good it may become a best-seller in your local bookstore one-day.
The quote above is a quote I've known from my childhood, thanks to 'The Princess Diaries' and it came back to mind as my moving out day drew closer. A big change of leaving home, moving from a small town to a big city, starting a new job, a new course so many new things whether it feels terrifying or exciting it still takes courage to make that step of faith. This blog would have nothing to record if I wasn't brave enough to take the risk that I could just fall flat on my face. I'm titling this blog 'A New Chapter', because it's the next step for my life, and it's the beginning of a new journey, to a new place, to a new style of life where I'm going to make more mistake, learn more lessons and discover more about who I am.
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